Most clients seek out Life Coaching at the point where nothing else seems to work. Life Coaching is often seen as a luxury so some clients find it hard to invest in. However, it’s not necessarily that what you have done so far has not worked. In this article, I will explore why you’re not ready for Life Coaching so that you can make a more informed decision.
Why would you hire a Life Coach?
I would say that people fall into two camps when it comes to hiring a Life Coach.
The first camp looks to Life Coaching when nothing else seems to work. They have tried counselling and other therapies but have not seen the results they want.
The other camp are those that understand the value of getting the right support from someone they can be accountable with. They accept that being challenged will help them push through their barriers to the success they want.
What happens in the coaching process?
When people come to the conclusion that they’re ready for Life Coaching, they often think that coaching will finally give them the answers. This is true however, you actually already have the answers. The Coach will help you get to them.
Coaching is not about telling you what to do because that is mentoring. Some Coaches will use mentoring as part of their strategies. Mentoring is usually only used as a last resort because otherwise, the Coaches’ opinion is being put upon the client which is not Coaching.
There are many things that happen in the coaching process but I’ve picked 3 that stand out for me in my practice. Using these, I am able to help clients move closer towards their goals:
1. The GROW model
Many Coaches use the GROW model theory in their practice. It’s the most popular and still highly effective. This model in itself helps Coaches see whether you’re ready for Life Coaching from the initial session. Sir John Whitmore founded the model which describes the coaching process.
This is a framework that Coaches often use to structure each session. One of the aims of the model is to provide the client with a step forward from each session. Therefore demonstrating how through coaching you are always moving towards your goal.
2. Being Challenged
Every Life Coach is different so it is first important to ensure that when you’re ready for Life Coaching, you seek out someone you have good rapport with. Your Life Coach will challenge you. This is essentially the ‘name of the game.’ We all have the capacity to achieve any goal we want but what stops us from achieving these goals is what Coaches can help you to identify.
As humans, we can all review what we do well and what we do not. What we tend to do is when something starts feeling uncomfortable, we will stop. This is often the breakthrough point in the Coaching process. A good Coach will challenge you to break through that barrier. It is an extremely freeing experience.
Nearly every challenge a client faces is based in fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of change, fear of acceptance. Using just the client’s experience, a Life Coach will help you understand why you are scared. They will then offer some tools to help you manage those fears better so that they don’t stop you from achieving your goals.
Most times the fears we have are deep-rooted in past traumas. Unless we have worked on this through counselling, we often go through life accepting our lives as they are. If you’re ready for Life Coaching however, you are saying to yourself that you do not accept those fears and that you want to change things.
When can you see results from Life Coaching?
People who think they are ready for Life Coaching but actually are not tend to expect miracles from the first session. I am very clear to all clients that the work we do in sessions will need to be continued in your everyday life for the Coaching process to be successful. Consistency, time and effort need to become your mantras.
The clients who are ready for Life Coaching often experience many ‘aha’ moments because they are actively and diligently doing the work required.
Here are a few reasons why you’re not ready for Life Coaching when it comes to getting results:
- You’ve come to Life Coaching after trying a number of different therapies and nothing has worked. I would ask, did the therapy not work or were you not ready?
- Resistant to change. Life Coaches will not change you. We will help you change some of your behaviours, thoughts and beliefs to help you get the results that you want.
- Expecting a Coach to tell you what to do and ‘sort your life out’ for you. You are an adult. Only you can do this for yourself. A good Coach will never do this for you.
How to know if you’re ready for Life Coaching
There are a number of reasons you would be ready for the Coaching process so I have picked 3 that seem quite common within my and my peers’ practices:
- Being ready to make the changes necessary to up-level your life and finally achieve the goals you want. These may be uncomfortable however you are ready to stretch yourself into an unknown because you do not want to live the way you have been anymore.
- You are ready to do what it takes to achieve success within the coaching process. Coming with an open mind and being willing to do the inter-sessional work. You will be willing to be challenged in a safe, responsible and trusting environment.
- Understanding that investing in your mental wellbeing will pay dividends in the long-term. Often clients are confused with their value perception. For example, if you are asking the Coach you want to work with for a discount, you are not ready for Life Coaching. This is not about the price of coaching, it is about the value you place on finally achieving your goals.
As long as you are willing to do the work, the Coaching process will help you get there.
Puja K McClymont – Certified Life Coach in London and NLP Practitioner
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